What I can do to be a good parent for my adolescent?
Parents often less involved in the lives of their children when they enter high school. But a teen needs the same amount of attention and love from you that when I was younger, and perhaps a little more. A good relationship with you and other adults is the best defense for your child as he grows and explores. For when you reach adolescence, you will already have had years of experience with him, the baby's father today will be the teenager's father tomorrow.
Your relationship with your child may change-in fact, is almost certain to be changed, as you develop the skills necessary to succeed as an adult. These changes can be enjoyable and beneficial. As your middle school child develop mentally and emotionally, their conversations will be more rich and meaty. As your interests develop and deepen, your teen will teach you "how to throw a baseball, what is happening in the city council or county board, or the merits of a new book.
The people of Spain has a wide variety attitudes, opinions and values. The estpañoles have different ideas and priorities, which affect how we raise our children. Despite these differences, research has shown that effective parents have the following qualities:
- Showing love. When children misbehave, make us angry. We also feel bad because we are angry or upset. But these feelings do not mean that we do not want our children. Teens need adults who can tell, people who connect with them, communicate with them, spend time with them and show interest genuine welfare. They learn to care for and love others. According to school counselor Carol Bleifield, "Parents can love their children but not necessarily love what they do-and children need to trust that this is true."
- Dan support. Adolescents need support as they struggle with problems that perhaps parents and families do not think they are so important. They need praise when they've done their best. They need encouragement to develop interests and personal characteristics.
Adolescents need adults who can tell, people who connect with them, communicate with them, spend time with them and show genuine concern for their welfare.
- set limits. Teens need parents or other adults to give them structure and supervision that is firm and suitable for their age and stage of development. The limits help to keep emotionally safe for all children and adolescents. Carole Kennedy is a former high school principal, a director-in-residence of the Department of Education of the United States (2000) and president of the National Association of Elementary School Principals. She puts it as follows, "They need parents who can say," No, you can go to the mall all day or to movies with this group of guys. " Psychologist Diana Baumrind identified three parenting styles: authoritarian, indulgent and authoritative expert. In analyzing the results of more than 20 years of research, she and her colleagues found that to be effective parents, it is best to avoid extremes. Authoritarian parents impose rigid rules and expect their children to always obey or indulgent parents who have few rules and give them too much freedom to their children, parents are likely to have more difficulties with their children. Children are at high risk for adverse emotional and behavioral. However, authoritative parents, who set clear limits and with good explanations, tend to have fewer difficulties with their teens. "Do as I say" probably did not very good results with your child when he was 6 years, and now that is a teenager, they will pay even less. (For more information on setting limits, see the section entitled Independence.)
- a role model. Teenagers need good examples. Try to live with the behavior and values \u200b\u200bthat you expect your child to develop. His actions speak louder than words. If you set high goals for yourself and treat others with kindness and respect, is more likely that your child will follow suit. While explore possibilities of adolescents who want to be, they look for examples from their parents, peers, celebrities and others to define who they are.
If you set high goals for yourself and treat others with kindness and respect, is more likely that your child will follow suit.
- Teaching responsibility. not born knowing how to act responsibly. A sense of responsibility is formed over time. As children grow, they learn to become increasingly responsible for:
do their homework, such as yard work, clean their rooms or helping to prepare the meals, that contribute to family welfare;
completing homework assignments without being nagged,
involved in community activities;
find ways to help others, and
be responsible for good and bad decisions made .
- Provide a variety of experiences. Adolescence is a time for exploring new areas and doing new things. Your child may try new sports, or new academic pursuits and read new books. Perhaps experiment with different types of art, or want to learn from different cultures or races and take part in community or religious activities. Depending on your resources, you can open doors for your child. You can introduce new people and new worlds. In doing so, you may renew interest or talent that has been ignored for years, and can set a good example for your child. Do not be discouraged when his interests change.
- Showing respect. is very tempting to label all young people as difficult and rebellious. But these youngsters vary as much as children in any other group. Your child needs to be treated with respect, which requires you to acknowledge and appreciate their differences and treat it as an individual. He also requires you to show compassion by trying to see things from their point of view and consider their needs and feelings. By treating your teenager with respect, you help to find pleasure in good behavior.
There are no perfect parents. But keep in mind that a bad decision during a difficult day (or week or month) will have a long-term negative effect on your child's life. What matters most to be an effective parent is what you do over time.
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